Reading and Relationships

I’m going to give away the secret and tell you guys that I am reading Fifty Shades.  Now, please, do not judge me until I get a review out there because I promise you that I am taking my personal reading mind to this.  I wish I was taking notes.  I’m going to read this review.

Today I listened to the newest Dear Book Nerd podcast today (Go.  Just go and listen because it is a truly awesome podcast for book nerds.) and one of the questions was from a guy who was disappointed with his wife’s recent reading choices.  He said that they discussed Henry Miller when they first met and he missed discussing books with her because as of late she has become taken with young adult and childrens books.  You really should listen to the podcast because the phrasing of all this was much more… domineering than this.  It got me thinking about reading and relationships and how the two have worked for me.

When I was in my first serious relationship, the guy I was with for 9 years, engaged for 8, he was fine with my reading at first.  By the end of our relationship, he did not really approve.  He started acting like there was something better I could be doing with my time.  He may have been right.  I remember him being particularly disgusted toward the end when I read Twilight.  For me it was amazing because I read the whole series in two weeks while working 30 hrs/wk and taking three grad classes.  My grades didn’t slip once.  I still worked out to CNN.  I still made time for watching Paris Hilton with my best friend and cooking and cleaning and dog training and everything else I was doing at the time.  For me it was a time of great balance and part of that was that I was reading complete fluff.  It balanced things.

After him, I dated the musician and he was always super supportive of my reading.  He was a comic book guy and got into playing Magic while we were together and those were things he could do while I read.  I sat through a number of MTG tournaments with my nose in a book and nobody thought any less of me.  I carried a book with me to gigs and sitting alone at the table I could read while the band got set up and I waited for the other girlfriends.  It was the first time that I felt free to read.  No judgement.

Then I met Hubby and Hubby, well, he just floored me from the start.  I don’t know if I’ve ever told our story here but Hubby had been around since I was engaged to the first guy.  He actually came to my birthday party as a friend of a friend with his gf of the time and I told my bestie that he was cute.  From the start one of the things I have loved about Hubby is that he pushes me.  We both love Stephen King and we like to read and discuss books.  As of late this hasn’t happened too much because he hasn’t been in a reading mood.  I was super excited when he listened to a book I had read and we got to talk about that.  But I don’t hold it against him and I don’t think he holds my reading against me.

I think that I have come to a point in my life where I have made the decision to have my own reading life.  I follow my nose wherever it takes me and I don’t want someone choosing for me.  Honestly, I was reading a parody of Fifty Shades and decided to try the series again.  The same day I decided to reread the Twilight series and read every John Green book.  I’m a little crazy but my reading is the one thing that I feel makes me an authentic human being.

I don’t know what all of that says about me and I’m okay with it.


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